I have low determination

Credits to June @Genie's party. I found this photo funny!

My sister mentioned one of this famous Taiwanese show, Kang Xi Lai Le episode which was about how the actress/singer lose weight and keep their weight. They use really extreme lose weight ways to achieve their dream weight like not eating for 10 days, not drinking for 24 hours to prevent oedema, 3 hours continuos work out per two days etc. Their side effects were imbalance hormone which stop their menstruation for two years, faint and keep trembling. This is so unhealthy, girls can sacrifice their health for appearance. To be honest, become thinner can gain more confidence, you do not need to worry other people will insult you. But their lose weight methods are way too insane. 2 years without any menstruation really can kill people.

The video inspired me to write about my weight issue. I am people who have no determination seriously. I was an overweight foetus which weighted around 4.6kg. I was an overweight Standard 1 student with 36 kilogram weight, I was overweight Standard 6 student with 60 kilogram and 160 cm, I was overweight form 1-2 students with 72 kilogram but higher, 165 cm. Then my dad gave me a mission in the end of the year of form 2, he would reward me RM100 if I lost 5 kg. RM100 was a huge amount for me that time. So I determined to lose weight, I lost that 5 kg easily in a month, and RM100 was mine of course. That time was quite an extreme lose weight, no carb, no meat, only soup,vegetables and fruits for me. Jogging and workout everyday. Form 3 I lost another 5 kg with the same lose weight methods. I faint in the first of the assembly in Form 3. I lost 10 kg in total, until 61 kg and I was 170 cm that time. I was born in heavy and wide bone family, so 61kg is my minimum, I couldn't lose more than that even I didn't eat which was pretty sad =(

Of course, became thinner, number of friends automatically increased. People who backstabbed me in Form 1 were my best friends in Form 3, I got myself a first boyfriend in Form 4. But my determination lost after my PMR. I didn't control my diet ended up I gained weight again. But not too much. One of the reason I dumped my first boyfriend, or perhaps he dumped me, or I felt less interest on him was he is so thin, and thinner than me, I had no confidence wtf =( I gained a lot when I came to Melbourne, I couldn't stand the temptation of yummy foods. A fat people normally won't admit they are fat, and ended up getting fatter and fatter SHIT! Family kept laughing at me when I went back on last dec, I was so cham I know hahaha! cheh!

This year I insisted to lose weight again in May. I controlled my daily calorie intake under 1200 calories which was really works, I lost 8 kgs in 3 months! BUT, when the sets and props workshop start, I started to eat more and forget about diet, so I gained back some weights. I bet with my younger sister that I will lose weight this time when I go back to Sandakan in the end of the year. So, now, I start my diet plan again. I really do hope my determination can keep on. My plan this time is No-Carb-Diet.

No carb in any of my meal, maybe a bit if really do no choice. Calories intake must be under 1200 calories. Never ever try to skip breakfast, a banana will work to boost up metabolism. Small bits of 85% dark chocolate before meal,at least 3 glasses of hot green tea everyday which cause me keep going to toilet. Only protein in main meal and try to avoid red meats. Keep eating fruits while feeling hungry. Make an early dinner or very light dinner. You will feel very hungry when you sleep, it means your system can't find any energy source and end up to burn your fat to gain energy. Weigh myself every morning, at least 0.3 kg gone, the most is 0.8 kg in a day. I really do hope my determination can keep long this time. Grace, show your taroness again! =)

Its really need gut to share about my weight issue and my weight. I know 60 kg is still heavy for some of you, but that is my minimum. I will never ever lighter than that even I don't eat anything for whole month, or even only my bone left I will still weigh for 60kg, quite pathetic eh.

Shit, this post takes me 1 hour to type. Bye everyone. Do not laugh at me ok although I am a fat pig and I look like McDull so I love McDull so much because I am his species wtf. rofl.